Connecting The Dots
How Do You Do It?
A lot of people (in the small community of those of you who read this) have asked me how I manage to post daily. It's very simple -- I have a lot of time alone, during which I talk to myself constantly. Don't worry, it's almost all done in my head; and I know that some of you out there do it as well. As you'd expect, most of the stuff I blog about is real, and are about things I have encountered in the last day or two. Even I'll admit that I am not clever enough to make most of this shit up!
Stereotypes Be Damned!
I feel badly portraying old people as bad drivers yesterday, so I decided to discuss another stereotype.
Question: What do you call a man in his late-30's, who has never been married, is neat and clean, folds his clothes after taking them out of the dryer, has a lot of shoes (thanks for reminding me YIW), is *cough* thin, likes art (perhaps he even has a large painting of the "Wizard of Oz" characters in his dining room) and theater?
Answer: Ga...infully Employed
Correct! Oh, I applaud your ability to see me as the 100% straight male that I am even though I possess some of the traits found in men who are not (Not that there is anything wrong with that).
Brother, Can You Spare A Dime?
I hate change. I am sure that those of you who know me well are snickering at the double entendre in that last statement. This time I mean pocket change -- pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters. I try hard to spend whatever I have in my pockets as soon as I can so that I don't accumulate so much that sound like a building superintendent (think Schneider on "One Day at a Time") when I walk. Inevitably, I don't have the proper change and in the process I obtain even more change. In my "perfect world" all prices would be rounded up or down to the nearest dollar.
The Pre-Flush
This may be a male-restroom phenomenon, but what is up with the people who flush a toilet before they use it? Granted, if something from the previous occupant remained then I can understand, but I hear it happen far too often for it to be coincidental. Did I miss some Urban Legend about a rat or snake coming up through the pipes as you mount the throne? Would flushing once prior to use remove this threat? It just seems like a waste of water to me.
Taking Another Stab At Legacy
The Urban Dictionary accepted "blomage", so I have taken another crack at altering our vernacular. This time I have submitted "Splenda Daddy". Look for it's inclusion soon...
The Return Of Tuesday's Toy Of The Day
And as an added bonus, you'll get two! While searching for the ultimate add ons for my iPod (I've given up trying to become a musician to meet women) I wound up eschewing the new for the tried and true.
The iPod desktop speakers - Back around 1985 I purchased a set of "portable" speakers which were designed to be plugged into a Sony Walkman (nostalgic types should follow this link). Theses speakers were put out by a company called Unitech (who I am sure are long-since gone). Unitech was smart enough to put the speakers in a carrying case that had an adjustable handle/strap on top and a cavity in the middle to hold the Walkman and batteries for the speakers. (oh, I so wish I could show a picture here). BRILLIANT!
The iPod car cupholder - When looking at these yesterday in stores ($10 for one type, $30 for the deluxe model) I had the bright idea "I bet if I shoved my iPod in a beer cozie (sp?) I could do the same thing for a lot less money." I tried it this morning and it worked perfectly! And, not only do I get an iPod holder, I get a beer can holder in times of "emergency."
And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal...
Current Mood - grumpy, weather related
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing The Thermals - "How We Know"
Current Read - nothing currently (are you noticing a trend?)
Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]
A lot of people (in the small community of those of you who read this) have asked me how I manage to post daily. It's very simple -- I have a lot of time alone, during which I talk to myself constantly. Don't worry, it's almost all done in my head; and I know that some of you out there do it as well. As you'd expect, most of the stuff I blog about is real, and are about things I have encountered in the last day or two. Even I'll admit that I am not clever enough to make most of this shit up!
Stereotypes Be Damned!
I feel badly portraying old people as bad drivers yesterday, so I decided to discuss another stereotype.
Question: What do you call a man in his late-30's, who has never been married, is neat and clean, folds his clothes after taking them out of the dryer, has a lot of shoes (thanks for reminding me YIW), is *cough* thin, likes art (perhaps he even has a large painting of the "Wizard of Oz" characters in his dining room) and theater?
Answer: Ga...infully Employed
Correct! Oh, I applaud your ability to see me as the 100% straight male that I am even though I possess some of the traits found in men who are not (Not that there is anything wrong with that).
Brother, Can You Spare A Dime?
I hate change. I am sure that those of you who know me well are snickering at the double entendre in that last statement. This time I mean pocket change -- pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters. I try hard to spend whatever I have in my pockets as soon as I can so that I don't accumulate so much that sound like a building superintendent (think Schneider on "One Day at a Time") when I walk. Inevitably, I don't have the proper change and in the process I obtain even more change. In my "perfect world" all prices would be rounded up or down to the nearest dollar.
The Pre-Flush
This may be a male-restroom phenomenon, but what is up with the people who flush a toilet before they use it? Granted, if something from the previous occupant remained then I can understand, but I hear it happen far too often for it to be coincidental. Did I miss some Urban Legend about a rat or snake coming up through the pipes as you mount the throne? Would flushing once prior to use remove this threat? It just seems like a waste of water to me.
Taking Another Stab At Legacy
The Urban Dictionary accepted "blomage", so I have taken another crack at altering our vernacular. This time I have submitted "Splenda Daddy". Look for it's inclusion soon...
The Return Of Tuesday's Toy Of The Day
And as an added bonus, you'll get two! While searching for the ultimate add ons for my iPod (I've given up trying to become a musician to meet women) I wound up eschewing the new for the tried and true.
The iPod desktop speakers - Back around 1985 I purchased a set of "portable" speakers which were designed to be plugged into a Sony Walkman (nostalgic types should follow this link). Theses speakers were put out by a company called Unitech (who I am sure are long-since gone). Unitech was smart enough to put the speakers in a carrying case that had an adjustable handle/strap on top and a cavity in the middle to hold the Walkman and batteries for the speakers. (oh, I so wish I could show a picture here). BRILLIANT!
The iPod car cupholder - When looking at these yesterday in stores ($10 for one type, $30 for the deluxe model) I had the bright idea "I bet if I shoved my iPod in a beer cozie (sp?) I could do the same thing for a lot less money." I tried it this morning and it worked perfectly! And, not only do I get an iPod holder, I get a beer can holder in times of "emergency."
And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal...
Current Mood - grumpy, weather related
Current Music - Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing The Thermals - "How We Know"
Current Read - nothing currently (are you noticing a trend?)
Cheers!
Paulie [eatl/ga]
posted by Paulie at 8:30 AM
<< Home